At 1:30am, I was holding you and rocking you and whispering in your ear to help ease the pain. We waited together for more than 45minutes for the Motrin and Tylenol to kick in and relieve the piercing ache in your gums caused by more than one tooth as it pushed its way through. At some point the pain was gone but you were still restless and so Dad got up and fed you a bottle, which seemed to help you glide into dreamland.
My dear little angel baby, one year ago you and I worked very hard to bring you into this world and since your arrival my life and the lives of both your Father and your Brother have altered significantly and most wonderfully. I catch myself looking at you sometimes and am so very amazed that you are here. It is one of those moments that are defined by contradiction. I can’t believe there is another baby blasting around the house investigating all sorts and yet I also find it hard to believe that you have not been here always. Today, on your birthday, I am experiencing a bouquet of bitter sweetness, mostly filled with awe, wonder, gratitude, delight and amusement but also peppered with sadness. It’s a good kind of sadness, though. The kind that inspires me to pick you up and wrap my heart around you in wishing that you will always be my tiny little angel. It is a sadness that comes with knowing that you are my last child, my last baby, that you are growing up all too quickly and that I have to let you go. But, sadness is never with me long because you, my small wonder, are there to crack a joke and make us all laugh out loud.
In the last month, your personality has really started to soar. The other day, you grabbed Dad’s toe and when he started laughing maniacally, you caught on immediately and started tickling his foot some more before you moved on to my feet. You love to laugh and you love to make us laugh. Sometimes when we are sitting at the dinner table we’ll all just start laughing just to see you burst into your own fit of giggles. The joke, apparently, is not relevant. It’s the laughter that counts.
Today, we will celebrate with friends and family. Some of the family will be with us in our house and some will be only a phone call away. Nana and Grandad are home in Toronto, Granny and Grandpa are in Nova Scotia visiting Granny’s Brother, Aunti Diane and Uncle Mal and the cousins are home in Port Moody (they are sick and so could not come L). Uncle Craig had to work and so he stayed in Gibson’s with your cousin, Matthew while Kyle is in Ontario at school. Anuti Ros, Uncle Brad and your sweet cousin-friend Sloane are going to stay home this year to keep our wee little pretty away from germs so she doesn’t’ get sick before her surgery.
Today, we will celebrate the harvest and your birthday. Joining us will be Uncle Marc, Aunti Kanetta, Aunti Kim, Uncle Rich, Lily, Sophie, Auntie Naomi and Aunti Gioia.
This year I give thanks for you, my sweet boy. But, I also give thanks for all of our family because it is the sum of all of them that create the wonderful balance that I have in my life today.